Parents, don't dress your girls like tramps

Parents, don't dress your girls like tramps
By LZ Granderson, CNN Contributor
April 19, 2011 8:52 a.m. EDT

Editor's note: LZ Granderson writes a weekly column for CNN.com. A senior writer and columnist for ESPN The Magazine and ESPN.com, he has contributed to ESPN's "Sports Center," "Outside the Lines" and "First Take." He is a 2011 and 2010 nominee and the 2009 winner of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation award for online journalism and a 2010 and 2008 honoree of the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association for column writing.

Grand Rapids, Michigan (CNN) -- I saw someone at the airport the other day who really caught my eye.

Her beautiful, long blond hair was braided back a la Bo Derek in the movie "10" (or for the younger set, Christina Aguilera during her "Xtina" phase). Her lips were pink and shiny from the gloss, and her earrings dangled playfully from her lobes.

You can tell she had been vacationing somewhere warm, because you could see her deep tan around her midriff thanks to the halter top and the tight sweatpants that rested just a little low on her waist. The icing on the cake? The word "Juicy" was written on her backside.

Yeah, that 8-year-old girl was something to see alright. ... I hope her parents are proud. Their daughter was the sexiest girl in the terminal, and she's not even in middle school yet.

Abercrombie & Fitch came under fire this spring for introducing the "Ashley," a push-up bra for girls who normally are too young to have anything to push up. Originally it was marketed for girls as young as 7, but after public outcry, it raised its intended audience to the wise old age of 12. I wonder how do people initiate a conversation in the office about the undeveloped chest of elementary school girls without someone nearby thinking they're pedophiles?

Push-up bikini controversy Video

What kind of PowerPoint presentation was shown to the Abercrombie executives that persuaded them to green light such a product?

That there was a demand to make little girls hot?
How young is too young to be sexy?
Push-up bikini controversy
RELATED TOPICS

* Child Development
* Culture and Lifestyle
* Family
* Parenting
* Body Image and Self-Esteem

I mean, that is the purpose of a push-up bra, right? To enhance sex appeal by lifting up, pushing together and basically showcasing the wearer's breasts. Now, thanks to AF Kids, girls don't have to wait until high school to feel self-conscious about their, uhm, girls. They can start almost as soon as they're potty trained. Maybe this fall the retailer should consider keeping a plastic surgeon on site for free consultations.

We've been here with Abercrombie before -- if you recall, about 10 years ago they sold thongs for 10-year-olds -- but they're hardly alone in pitching inappropriate clothing to young girls. Four years ago the popular "Bratz" franchise introduced padded bras called "bralettes" for girls as young as six. That was also around the time the good folks at Wal-Mart rolled out a pair of pink panties in its junior department with the phrase "Who Needs Credit Cards" printed on the front.

I guess I've been out-of-the-loop and didn't realize there's been an ongoing stampede of 10-year-old girls driving to the mall with their tiny fists full of cash demanding sexier apparel.

What's that you say? Ten-year-olds can't drive? They don't have money, either? Well, how else are they getting ahold of these push-up bras and whore-friendly panties?

Their parents?

Noooo, couldn't be.

What adult who wants a daughter to grow up with high self-esteem would even consider purchasing such items? What parent is looking at their sweet, little girl thinking, "She would be perfect if she just had a little bit more up top."

And then I remember the little girl at the airport. And the girls we've all seen at the mall. And the kiddie beauty pageants.

And then I realize as creepy as it is to think a store like Abercrombie is offering something like the "Ashley", the fact remains that sex only sells because people are buying it. No successful retailer would consider introducing an item like a padded bikini top for kindergarteners if they didn't think people would buy it.

If they didn't think parents would buy it, which begs the question: What in the hell is wrong with us?

It's easy to blast companies for introducing the sexy wear, but our ire really should be directed at the parents who think low rise jeans for a second grader is cute. They are the ones who are spending the money to fuel this budding trend. They are the ones who are suppose to decide what's appropriate for their young children to wear, not executives looking to brew up controversy or turn a profit.

I get it, Rihanna's really popular. But that's a pretty weak reason for someone to dress their little girl like her.

I don't care how popular Lil' Wayne is, my son knows I would break both of his legs long before I would allow him to walk out of the house with his pants falling off his butt. Such a stance doesn't always makes me popular -- and the house does get tense from time to time -- but I'm his father, not his friend.

Friends bow to peer pressure. Parents say, "No, and that's the end of it."

The way I see it, my son can go to therapy later if my strict rules have scarred him. But I have peace knowing he'll be able to afford therapy as an adult because I didn't allow him to wear or do whatever he wanted as a kid.

Maybe I'm a Tiger Dad.

Maybe I should mind my own business.

Or maybe I'm just a concerned parent worried about little girls like the one I saw at the airport.

In 2007, the American Psychological Association's Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls issued a report linking early sexualization with three of the most common mental-health problems of girls and women: eating disorders, low self-esteem and depression. There's nothing inherently wrong with parents wanting to appease their daughters by buying them the latest fashions. But is getting cool points today worth the harm dressing little girls like prostitutes could cause tomorrow?

A line needs to be drawn, but not by Abercrombie. Not by Britney Spears. And not by these little girls who don't know better and desperately need their parents to be parents and not 40-year-old BFFs.

The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of LZ Granderson.

Song of the Week - Stornoway

Yes, I'll admit it.

They're freakin awesome.

Boats and Trains

Song of the Week.



Once again, thanks go to Alex.

Jenny and Tyler

You Can Count on Me.... Like 1, 2, 3

Doodling in Math Class

Shout Your Love from the Rooftops

She's a very special lady with a very special mission :)

http://www.wbez.org/blog/mission-amy-kr/2011-02-07/mission-60-shout-your-love-rooftops-81901

Shout Your Love from the Rooftops

She's a very special lady with a very special mission :)

Would YOU shout your love from the rooftops?

The Jetset Life is Going to Kill You

Let's just say that sledding is an extremely dangerous sport, and you shouldn't slide down a hill on your face.

I Missed You

Why are you so far from me?

In my arms is where you ought to be

How long will you make me wait?

I don’t know how much more I can take

I missed you

But I haven’t met you

Oh how I want to

How I do

Slowly counting down the days

Till I finally know your name

Ooo the way your hand feels round my waist

The way you laugh

The way your kisses taste

I missed you

But I haven’t met you

Oh how I want to

How I do, How I do

I missed you

But I haven’t met you

Oh how I missed you

I haven’t met you

Oh but I want to

Oh how I want to

Do you ever hear my name?

I’m still waiting patiently.

Confession of the Day

I'm obsessed with Ellie Goulding.

I have no idea what her background is, how old she is, or even how many cds she's recorded.

It's pathetic.

But I'll just let you listen.






Thank you, Alexander Hermes. You're awesome.

Micro.....

Oh, school. That wonderful institution of learning at which all are enlightened. How can you help but adore it?

Yeah right. Even I’M not that weird.

Sure, school is awesome. I do love learning, I love the people, and I love the atmosphere. But let’s be honest: if it’s a choice between lots of hard work and boredom, and endless amount of free-time, who chooses Numero Uno?

No one, that’s who. Really, it’s quite sad. The whole point of general education class requirements in a college degree plan is, actually, to ‘enlighten’ those who take them. It’s to give every college student a basic, well-rounded, functional knowledge of the plethora (yes, PLETHORA) of life concepts that affect and mold our lives, whether we are aware of them or not.

Take Microeconomics: Not many people enjoy a 3 hour lecture on how trade, markets, supply and demand, and equity all tie together into a respected branch of the social sciences. And in many people’s minds, economics = money. Simple as that. We’re just going to the ignore ‘micro-,’ whatever it stands for.

In practicality, microeconomics determine how much you pay for a roll of toilet paper, how much you get paid at your day job (your night job, too!), and how long it will take you to pay off the loan on your car.

It seems obvious to me, then, that microeconomics is a pretty big part of my life, and that it would be both beneficial and interesting (gasp) for me to know a little bit more about the concept.

Am I the only one?

17 Again...and Again...and Again

I finally watched "17 Again"....again. It's been months, but I'm glad to find out it's just as funny as it was the first time! Here are the quotes I took from it:

Naomi: "Come on, you'll do great. You've got the butt of a twelve year old boy."

Mike: "Would you stop staring at me?"
Ned: "It's freaking me out."
Mike: "It's freaking ME out! I'm pubescent!"

Ned: "Okay so it's a classic transformation story. It appears in the literature time and time again. Were you at any point shot by a gamma ray?"
Mike: "No."
Ned: "Exposed to gamma radiation?"
Mike: "NO, Ned."
Ned: "Because...you wouldn't see it. That eliminates these and those and most of that side. Are you now or have you ever been a Norse god, vampire, or time-traveling cyborg?"
Mike: "I've known you since, what, first grade? I think maybe I would have TOLD you."
Ned: "A vampire wouldn't tell. A cybog wouldn't know."
Mike: "Just shut up."

Ned: "What is this you're wearing?"
Mike: "This is cool. This is hip. I have a picture of Kevin Federline wearing the exact same thing."
Ned: "I don't know who that is."
Mike: "What are you wearing? I told you show up like a dad. You look like Clay Aiken."

Mike: "Are you sure these look legit?"
Ned: "Oh yeah. Look who you're talking to. I'm the guy who invented the software that prevents people from stealing music. I also invented the software that helps people steal music, but that's a happy coincidence."

Ned: "I think our hands just made a baby."

Ned: "Did you see her undress me with her eyes?"
Mike: "I don't think that's what that was."

Ned: "We're going shopping."
Mike: "Really?"
Ned: "Yeah. Your shirt is bedazzled."
Mike: "Bedazzled with rhinestones."

Jaime: "If that boy were an apple, he'd be a Delicious."

Mike: "According to leading psychiatrists, Stan's a bully for one of three reasons. One: Underneath all of that male bravado there's a little girl banging on the door of the closet trying to get out. Two: Like a caveman, Stan's brain is underdeveloped. Therefore, Stan is unable to use self-control. And so he acts out aggressively. And the third reason: Stan has a small wiener."

Mike: “He’s right. I don’t need one. You know why I don’t need one? Because there’s no one I’m in love with. It’s called “making love,” isn’t it? Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but I think that means you do it with someone you love. And preferably when you’re married. You know, when you’re ready to take that love and turn it into a baby. Because that’s what love is. It’s that first moment when you hold your baby girl and you didn’t know that anything could be small or so delicate. And you feel that tiny heart beat and you know that you couldn’t love anything more in the whole world. And you hope that you can do right by that little girl and always be there to catch her when she falls, and that nothing ever hurts her, not a broken arm or a bad dream or a broken heart.”

Ned: "Busted for fighting. Nice. Who won?"
Mike: "You know, it was actually pretty even."
Ned: "Really? On YouTube it kinda looked like you got your ass kicked. I saw it a couple times."

Mike: "What are you wearing?"
Ned: "Hm? Beckham."
Mike: "No, what?"
Ned: "Oh, the clothes. Oh, right. To the untrained eye, I look like a total idiot."
Mike: "You do, in fact."

Alex: "Do you dance with all your friends' moms?"
Mike: "Pretty much."

Mike: "Carnations. What a douche bag."

Mike: "If you girls don't respect yourselves, then how do you expect anyone else to respect you?"
Jaime: "You don't have to respect me."
Lauren: "No, you don't have to respect ME."
Samantha: "You don't even have to remember my name."
Lauren: "Wow, that's slutty."
Mike: "This is some other dad's problem."

Mike: "You might have to meet a few more jerks. But one day you're going to meet a boy who treats you the way you deserve to be treated. Like the sun rises and sets with you."

Maggie: "Are you confused?
Mike: "I am very confused, yes. Extremely confused."
Maggie: "Oh, my god. I get it now. And your hair is always perfectly coiffed and you have highlights."
Mike: "What are you talking about?"
Maggie: "I mean, dude, your jeans are REALLY tight."
Mike: "I'm not gay!"

Jane: "I am the principal, and I cannot be seen with my students' parents."
Ned: "But, Jane, how can you be seen with me when I'm wearing...a cloak of invisibility? Jane, all I'm asking is a chance for us to be friends. Because you're the one I want by my side when I'm storming the Elvish Castle of Ganakinesh."
Jane: "You can plunder my dungeon any time."
Ned: "I'll bring my long-bow."

Who Are You When I'm Not Looking?

My oh my, you're so good looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all you're cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking

Do you pour a little something on the rocks
Slide down the hallway in your socks
When you undress, do you leave a path
Then sink to your nose in a bubble bath

My oh my, you're so good looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all you're cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking

I wanna know, I wanna know, I wanna know

Do you break things when you get mad
Eat a box of chocolate cause you're feeling bad
Do you paint your toes 'cause you bite your nails
And call up mama when all else fails

Who are you when I'm not around
When the door is locked and the shades are down
Do you listen to your music quietly
And when it feels just right are you thinking of me

I wanna know, I wanna know, I wanna know

My oh my, you're so good looking
But who are you when I'm not looking

New URL

I plan on changing the URL of my blog sometime in the near future, but I wanted to give you guys a fair warning ahead of time.

The new, but as of yet non-existent, URL will be www.butterfliesandmemories.blogspot.com.

The House That Built Me

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it, this brokenness inside me might start healing. Out here it's like I'm someone else. I thought that I might find myself. If I could just come in, I swear I'll leave. I won't take nothing but a memory, from the house that built me.

Me-Shirts

This week, I happened upon many, many t-shirts which I would be proud to wear. As a college student, I feel it my right, née my duty, to display such fashion brain-children for the world to see. This one ------>
needs no explanation.














We move on to the band section, with Adam Young and his alter genius Owl City representing.
Note that this is indeed the last pressing of this shirt. However, I trust the majority of you can manipulate a iron effectively and will therefore not become downheartened.







That WAS a joke.

And for the grand finale, everyone's favorite, the dashing (fake) literary hero, Fitzwilliam
!!!!!!!

*wild applause*

The end.

Meredith Schlabach Photography

Look

Love:

Hollywood - Michael Buble

The Eternal Flame of Muslim Outrage

by Michelle Malkin
Creators Syndicate
Copyright 2010

Shhhhhhh, we’re told. Don’t protest the Ground Zero mosque. Don’t burn a Koran. It’ll imperil the troops. It’ll inflame tensions. The “Muslim world” will “explode” if it does not get its way, warns sharia-peddling imam Feisal Abdul Rauf. Pardon my national security-threatening impudence, but when is the “Muslim world” not ready to “explode”?

At the risk of provoking the ever-volatile Religion of Perpetual Outrage, let us count the little-noticed and forgotten ways.

Just a few months ago in Kashmir, faithful Muslims rioted over what they thought was a mosque depicted on underwear sold by street vendors. The mob shut down businesses and clashed with police over the blasphemous skivvies. But it turned out there was no need for Allah’s avengers to get their holy knickers in a bunch. The alleged mosque was actually a building resembling London’s St. Paul’s Cathedral. A Kashmiri law enforcement official later concluded the protests were “premeditated and organized to vitiate the atmosphere.”

Indeed, art and graphics have an uncanny way of vitiating the Muslim world’s atmosphere. In 1994, Muslims threatened German supermodel Claudia Schiffer with death after she wore a Karl Lagerfeld-designed dress printed with a saying from the Koran. In 1997, outraged Muslims forced Nike to recall 800,000 shoes because they claimed the company’s “Air” logo looked like the Arabic script for “Allah.” In 1998, another conflagration spread over Unilever’s ice cream logo — which Muslims claimed looked like “Allah” if read upside-down and backward (can’t recall what they said it resembled if you viewed it with 3D glasses).

Even more explosively, in 2002, an al-Qaida-linked jihadist cell plotted to blow up Bologna, Italy’s Church of San Petronio because it displayed a 15th century fresco depicting Mohammed being tormented in the ninth circle of Hell. For years, Muslims had demanded that the art come down. Counterterrorism officials in Europe caught the would-be bombers on tape scouting out the church and exclaiming, “May Allah bring it all down. It will all come down.”

That same year, Nigerian Muslims stabbed, bludgeoned or burned to death 200 people in protest of the Miss World beauty pageant — which they considered an affront to Allah. They shouted, “Allahu Akbar!” And “Down with beauty!” And “Miss World is sin!” Contest organizers fled out of fear of inflaming further destruction. When Nigerian journalist Isioma Daniel joked that Mohammed would have approved of the pageant and that “in all honesty, he would probably have chosen a wife from among them,” her newspaper rushed to print three retractions and apologies in a row. It didn’t stop Muslim vigilantes from torching the newspaper’s offices. A fatwa was issued on Daniel’s life by a Nigerian official in the sharia-ruled state of Zamfara, who declared that “the blood of Isioma Daniel can be shed. It is abiding on all Muslims wherever they are to consider the killing of the writer as a religious duty.” Daniel fled to Norway.

In 2005, British Muslims got all hot and bothered over a Burger King ice cream cone container whose swirly-texted label resembled, you guessed it, the Arabic script for “Allah.” The restaurant chain yanked the product in a panic and prostrated itself before the Muslim world. But the fast-food dessert had already become a handy radical Islamic recruiting tool. Rashad Akhtar, a young British Muslim, told Harper’s Magazine how the ice cream caper had inspired him: “Even though it means nothing to some people and may mean nothing to some Muslims in this country, this is my jihad. I’m not going to rest until I find the person who is responsible. I’m going to bring this country down.”

In 2007, Muslims combusted again in Sudan after an infidel elementary school teacher innocently named a classroom teddy bear “Mohammed.” Protesters chanted, “Kill her, kill her by firing squad!” and “No tolerance — execution!” She was arrested, jailed and faced 40 lashes for blasphemy before being freed after eight days. Not wanting to cause further inflammation, the teacher rushed to apologize: “I have great respect for the Islamic religion and would not knowingly offend anyone, and I am sorry if I caused any distress.”

And who could forget the global Danish cartoon riots of 2006 (instigated by imams who toured Egypt stoking hysteria with faked anti-Islam comic strips)? From Afghanistan to Egypt to Lebanon to Libya, Pakistan, Turkey and in between, hundreds died under the pretext of protecting Mohammed from Western slight, and brave journalists who stood up to the madness were threatened with beheading. It wasn’t really about the cartoons at all, of course. Little-remembered is the fact that Muslim bullies were attempting to pressure Denmark over the International Atomic Energy Agency’s decision to report Iran to the UN Security Council for continuing with its nuclear research program. The chairmanship of the council was passing to Denmark at the time. Yes, it was just another in a long line of manufactured Muslim explosions that were, to borrow a useful phrase, “premeditated and organized to vitiate the atmosphere.”

When everything from sneakers to stuffed animals to comics to frescos to beauty queens to fast-food packaging to undies serves as dry tinder for Allah’s avengers, it’s a grand farce to feign concern about the recruitment effect of a few burnt Korans in the hands of a two-bit attention-seeker in Florida. The eternal flame of Muslim outrage was lit a long, long time ago.